Friday, April 18, 2014

10 Items Of Clothing Every Woman Actually Has In Her Closet

I recently read an article titled "10 Items Of Clothing Every Woman Should Have In Her Closet."

While the idea of having the simple little black dress, the mix and match t-shirts and the perfect clutch purse sounds great, when I look into my closet, I find a fair share of unique and somewhat odd items. Looking over these articles of clothing, I got to thinking that most girls probably have closets like mine. So without further ado, I give you 10 Items Of Clothing Every Woman (Actually) Has In Her Closet. 

1. Your "lucky" shirt


Okay, or maybe it is a skirt or even a scarf, but one item of clothing that has somehow, magically made you some epic memories in the past. Maybe you were wearing it the day you met your boyfriend, or every time you have it on, the Seahawks win and your hair just happens to also look fabulous. Whatever the reason may be, that item has special powers and you know it. You'd rather loose your Coach purse than part with your lucky piece of fabric.



2. Something you have had since high school


Fashion trends come and go so it is good to keep some items handy for when they make their comeback. You still have the denim jacket you bought in high school and a crop top from eighth grade. I mean, why give them away and just have to buy them all over again? However, if you are still hanging on to a pair of capri pants or a corduroy anything, I think we can agree that the world would be in a sad place if those items make their comeback.



3. An item that does not belong to you


You've had your sister's sweater for a year, which means she probably forgot about it and now it is all yours, just like you planned. Or you've got your best friend's dress that you swear you'll give back to her next time you see her, and yet it never fails to slip your mind when you head out the door to do just that. Heck, it could even be something you have no idea who it belongs to. You just woke up one morning after a night of tequila shots with a green scarf tied around your body like a pageant sash. If it is in your closet, it belongs to you. End of story.



4. A dress you keep for church, funerals or anytime you have to look nice around old people


It's in the back of your closet, buried behind your winter coats and old bridesmaid dresses. It is the most hideous thing you own, by far. You have tried it on in front of the mirror every time that you purge your closet to donate old stuff to Goodwill, but you can never bring yourself to get rid of it. It is the only thing you have that is acceptable to wear when you are trying not to stand out. And you know it works too because somehow every time you wear it, a woman over eighty tells you how much she likes it. No matter how much you hate it, you know you have to keep it.



5. That thing you have never worn


It has been three years and that denim vest still has the tags on it. They were so in that you just had to get one. Only, when you got home, you realized that nothing else you own even goes with it. But you can't just give it away, you paid $60 for it! So you keep it forever, waiting for the moment that you swear is bound to come when you have just the right outfit to go with it. Hang in there denim vest, pleather pants and sweater dress. You day will come. It will come.



6. The thing that all your friends tell you is hideous but you know they are just blind


Your vintage trench coat was such a steal. Can you believe you found it at Goodwill for only $8? Whenever you wear it out, your friends tell you that you look like streaker or a 1920's detective, but you know they are all just jealous. Seriously, you make a statement with that thing on, and it's vintage. Did I say it was vintage?



7. Your interview outfit


For your first, big, corporate job interview, you splurged and bought yourself a pant suit. Sure, you didn't get the job, but now you never have to wonder what you are going to wear at that next big interview. It's not too tight, not too revealing. It sort of makes you look like a female politician, which must be a good thing. When you get the job, you'd rather die than wear anything as hideous as that to the office but hey, it will get the job done.



8. Your skanky going out dress


I'm not talking about your go-to little black dress you wear on most occasions out on the town. No, no. I am talking about the shiny, strappy, scantily clad piece you wear when you are feeling naughty. It is the one that barely covers your backside and makes you look like you walked straight out of a Kanye music video. It is not quite prostitute worthy but more high-class escort status. Your father would have a heart attack if he ever saw you in it, but you keep it around for those bachelorette parties and weekends in Vegas.



9. The pants you bought too small on purpose


You were in the dressing room trying on your regular size and, "wait a minute, why can't I get these up past my thighs? I am not buying a size up." So you walk out of the store with your too-small jeans determined to get skinny enough again to wear them. They sit in your closet as a reminder to go to the gym, go for a run, or for goodness sake, put that cookie down!...But eventually you decide that they totally aren't your style of wash anyway.



10. That item you totally rock


Yeah, you know exactly what item it is, don't you. It is that dress that fits you like a glove and always scores you free drinks at the bar. Maybe it is your turquoise top that is the perfect color to brighten your eyes. It could be those shoes that just really pull any outfit together perfectly. Whatever it is, no one looks better in it than you. Even if it was between you and Kate Upton in a "Who wore it better" stand off, you would still totally win. When you wear it, you feel classy, comfortable and fearless. Move over world. This girl is ready to strut her stuff.

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